I have seeds

This happened in Spring 2016 Im just getting around to writing about it. Mason was 9, Micah 6 and Ethan 3.

Chris was out of town on a missions trip with some men in from church to Colombia South America.  I am home with the boys.  As I'm tucking Micah in the bed he asks me how babies get inside of a mommy.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME KID? Don't you know that you're a boy and DADS have"The Talk" with their boys?!!

I answered the way I have in the past, "God puts the baby in there"

This usual answer wasn't cutting it for Micah.

Micah- "No, Mom, HOW does the baby get in there? How does it become a baby. Because in school, you know we have those incubators with the eggs and baby chicks and we are learning about chickens and frogs and how they grow. Well, do we start as an egg inside of the mommy and then when we are mature enough we hatch out? And I know you said that you have to have a mommy AND a daddy and boy and a girl to be the parents of a baby but what does the boy have to do with the egg?"

I took a deep breath and just started answering his questions.

Me- "Well actually you're right Micah mommies have eggs inside them and the dads have seeds and thats why you need both a mommy and a daddy to make a baby.  The egg has to be fertilized with the daddy seed...okay, let me tuck you in"

Micah- "Oh, I see"

Me- "Sigh of relief- that went well"...but wait for it...I had my hand on his door knob... ON THE DOOR KNOB!

Micah- "so you have eggs inside you right now?"

Me- "Yes, actually when God created me he created my body to produce eggs, but they are really tiny and you can't see them, good night."

Micah- "So how does the baby come out? Do you lay an egg? AND how does the daddy seed get from the daddy into the mommy? And if you were born with your eggs does that mean I have seeds inside of me?

Me- "uh umm, (releasing my hand from the door knob reluctantly walking back towards his bed) well....we are mammals so we are born alive, we are actually alive as soon as the seed and the egg meet inside the mommy's womb.  And you know how you have a penis because you're a boy? Well, girls don't have a penis, they have a vagina and thats a special hole for the baby to come out. "

Micah- "Okay well then how do the daddy seeds get inside there and where do they come from how do they get out of the daddy into the mommy."

Me- (with raised eye brows, a scowl and internal scream CHRIS WHERE ARE YOU??????)  "God lets daddies produce seeds too and your penis has a place for the pee pee to come out and also a place for the seeds, which is actually called sperm to come out."

Micah- "okay so how does it get in the mommy? "

Me- (ARE YOU KIDDING ME?) "remember the hole for the baby to come out, the vagina? Well, the daddy's penis goes into the vagina.

Micah- OH, I get it!  Goodnight mom.

Me- (still struggling not to show my sweat-) "I love you Micah, sleep well"

I got up, walked out of his room and shook my head....this is NOT how I thought Micah would learn about the way babies are made.  BUT, I am, NOW, several months later, thankful that before it was awkward, that I was able to lay some ground work so that when Chris does have a serious talk with Micah, "THE TALK" maybe it will be easier.

I thought that was behind us...well, Chris is STILL out of town and the story continues...

We are sitting around the dinner table Me, Mason, Micah and Ethan and then the conversation moves from football to ....

Micah- "Hey Mason, did you know we have seeds?"

Mason- laughing his big brother laugh that conveys that Micah has absolutely NO CLUE what he's talking about- "No we don't Micah"

Mason looks at me for approval. my head is staring at my plate as I try to pretend to need to cut up my chicken nugget.

Micah- "Yes we do, Mom said so, right mom, tell him, thats how babies are made"

Me- praying a neighbor would need a cup of sugar or that Ethan would need to go pee or that someone ANYONE would text me....crickets and all eyes staring on me waiting for a response...."Yes, Mason, you do have seeds, your seeds meet up with the mommy egg to create a baby"

Mason- SILENT- HUGE EYES- LONG PAUSE---- Stands up, pushes his chair in, raises both hands and runs around the kitchen island shouting and laughing, "SEEDS, SEEDS, I HAVE SEEDS!!! I CANT BELIVE I HAVE SEEDS"

Me- thinks to self- "OH no, this is getting out of control, WHERE ARE YOU CHRIS"

Micah- "I told you, I can't believe you didn't know that"

Mason- "Mom, I want to see them, When can I see my seeds"

Me- "you can't they are too tiny and this is something you need to discuss further with daddy when he GETS HOME FROM HIS MISSIONS TRIP....Okay guys, this is dinner time, lets eat our food, this conversation isn't one your three year old brother is old enough to have."

Ethan- "wait- I have seeds too?"

Me- "yes, PLEASE EVERYONE EAT DINNER hurry so we can watch a show together"

All- "but we already had screen time????"

Me- "I know, but its okay, lets just all stop talking and eat so we can watch chopped Jr or AFV or Paw Patrol or whatever is on okay, lets all just eat our chicken nuggets and see who can clean their plate first!"


Gen 2:18- "It is not good for man to be alone, I will make a helper suitable for him"  Ladies- before your husband goes out of the country and leaves you alone with your three boys, make sure he has helped you out and already had "THE TALK" with your little boys.